We're on the party patrol!

Hey, lamewads. What's good in the hood? If you've found this website, then I admire your surfing skills. You must have had to crawl into the deepest, darkest reaches of this vast internet to find your way to this poor excuse for a website. And I mean it. As a rule of thumb, you have to slog through at least three different manga fan art websites, no more than five goatse hyperlinks, and twelve pop-up ads (two-thirds of which involve child garments) before you can get here. Yes, kudos to you for plunging down into the abysmal informational black hole called the world wide web. And thank you even more for choosing this one out of all the billions of others. How did you find this website anyway? Google? What'd you have to type in to find it? "Amateurishly produced, low-bandwidth websites with under 5 yearly page views?" My site would still be 104th on the queue in that search. Regardless of how you found it, you're reading it now. While you could be contributing to the betterment of society, you instead choose to read this, which accomplishes nothing (aside from a momentarily distracting you from the horrible reality that is your pathetic life, because come on, how great could your life really be if you actively seek out websites like this?). Yes, you sure do make some questionable decisions with your life, reader. And visiting this site is just the latest in a series of bad choices that will ultimately lead to your downfall. So sit back, relax, and enjoy wasting precious fractions of your life.